Women's Safety Tips - Repel Or Attract Attackers, the Choice is Yours

Confident men, colleagues and friends are attracted to women with confidence and attackers are repelled by them. Confidence, hmmm, seems simple enough but is it? Self-image is what we think of ourselves. Self-esteem is how we feel about ourselves and self-confidence is how we act.

Can confidence be faked? Temporarily yes, but if it comes across as arrogance, it can attract attackers rather than repel them.

I address confident body language in my article, "Women's Personal Safety Secret #2," which is important in repelling attackers. Below is another way you can become more confident, attracting the right people - repelling the wrong ones.

"What Would You Do?" Can Repel Attackers and May Save Your Life!

We hear about crime and often do nothing to prevent it from happening to us. A good habit to get into is thinking about what you would do if the same situation occurred in your life. Although a bit scary, thinking it through has several benefits.

1. You've acknowledged your vulnerability therefore, you don't look oblivious like most people do (attackers love oblivious people)
2. You have a plan of action which gives you confidence (attackers are repelled by confident people because they themselves are weak).
3. You are more aware of your surroundings and therefore may avoid situations of vulnerability (attackers hate aware people).
4. When you have thought things through, you walk more confidently and body language is the most common way attackers select victims.

So there you go. Just by simply thinking through a situation with you at the center, you benefit by being safer immediately attracting people who are confident themselves and repelling weak ones who will drag you down and or victimize you. Just being dragged down is a form of attack because it weakens you mentally and emotionally, which in turn, weakens you physically.

Gross Seekers and Arrogance

Although gross curiosity gives birth to rubber-neckers at crash and crime scenes, the magnitude of the situation seems to bounce off of those same people who very likely have their heads in the sand, ignoring their own vulnerability. The "head buried in the sand" syndrome causes those buried to look insecure in a dangerous situation or arrogant if they try to fake confidence. Arrogance is insecurity personified and looks opposite of confident.

As a paramedic in my early 20's, I still get asked, "What is the worst thing you ever saw?" Obviously, the question begs for therapy rather than an answer but the people who ask it are usually careless in their lives and know little about avoiding dangerous situations. Although unfortunate for them (and hopefully not tragic) this makes it easy for us to set ourselves apart from the general public by looking and being confident. Just the knowledge of what you would do in a certain situation makes your body language stronger without you even knowing it. Well, now you know it!

Remember:

1. Attackers may be male or female of any age
2. Attacks may be verbal, mental, emotional or physical
3. Attackers have a plan of attack - do you have a plan of escape?
   

Confident or Insecure?

Confidence can keep you out of dangerous situations and improves your physical health as well. It is obvious how confidence attracts confident people, friends, significant others and great coworkers, isn't it?

If you are a person who attracts people who are insecure, remember that your own confidence has to be in place to attract a different kind of person. You can only help an insecure person so much because self-image, self-esteem and self-confidence are all inside jobs. If you get dragged down, your self-confidence will suffer.

The concept of personal safety being quite dependent on confidence may be new to you but I'm sure you'll agree it makes sense. Remember that confident men, colleagues and friends are attracted and attackers are repelled by a confident woman.

Bonus Safety Tip: Holding your head up is the most important aspect of confident body language. And now I would like to offer you free access to printed and audio versions of the "Seven Deadly Personal Safety Mistakes" and free Personal Safety TeleSeminars when you subscribe to my free weekly Safety Quick Tips; a 52 week newsletter on Personal Safety. You can get your instant access at http://www.PersonalSafetyTrainer.com

Women of Today - The New Super Power

We talk about equality, equal wages, political correctness and acceptability in all walks of life. But it is worth considering whether these factors apply, when it comes to women. They are paid less in their work places and in the field of games such as Tennis. It's a kind of accepted saying that women work less than men and therefore deserve less! It may have been true in the past when women were expected to stay at home and look after the children and nothing more. But women have changed over the years: they have 'come out'!

Intelligent, sharp-witted, agile, independent and immaculately dressed; there you have it, 'The New Super Power', the women of today! She is capable of accomplishing anything, if given the chance. She goes out to work and return home in the evening, only to find that the evening meal is yet to be prepared! How many men do you find who are happy to show their culinary expertise in the kitchen? It is expected of women, but the reverse is true for men; of course there are exceptions to the norm. Men today are more willing, to try cooking, cleaning, change the occasional nappy and perhaps even to cope better when the wife earns more.

Gone are the days when she toiled at the kitchen stove all day long; she is aware of her needs and willing to fight for them. She expects to be given the respect she deserves, both at home and at work. Women were happy, to deal with the daily routine of ordinary life, parents' evening, swimming lessons, music and dance classes, sitting room full of coloring books and toys and still are, but they demand more. They have realized their intellectual potential and determined to do something about it! One likes to believe that the 'Dumb dame' stigma has withered in the wake of equal opportunity. She is still branded as 'Loud' if she as much as voices her opinion and would be snubbed if she happens to be more intelligent in certain circles. The dictum, 'Women should be seen and not heard' is still very much alive! Men still find it very difficult to accept new ideas when it originates from a woman.

Women on two wheels have become a familiar sight on the roads of most Asian countries during the past few years; it is not unusual to find a woman taking her whole family on her two-wheeler, children to school and husband to work and then manages to reach her office on time. It would have been inconceivable a few years ago! One can find even driving schools run by women just for women. She has a major part to play in every aspect of the family decisions and how it is implemented; at least she likes to believe that she does!

It is rather difficult combining a career and a decent home life, 'Super woman' though she is. She needs to feel supported and fulfilled. Is she stressed out? She may arrive at work feeling as if she has already done a full day's work, colleagues may doubt her commitment to her jobs, making it difficult for her. She may be told that children with behaviour problems were the products of families where mothers worked, despite her belief that children get more 'quality time'. Women of today expect their partners to contribute towards childcare and household chores. Most women even find time to help the children with their homework. It is a known fact that the women are in the fore- front, in the field of medicine, nursing and teaching, to name a few.

These days, women are even controlling their reproductive destiny to some extent. Contraceptive pills are not the only ones on their list, but emergency contraceptive pills, the Implanon, IUD/IUS, the patch and the injection are very much on their list of things to consider. They are aware and quiet willing to accept other methods when any of these fail. Women are determined to decide when they wish to have babies and how. They need, not just babies but the power to create an environment that is fit enough for their survival financially and socially. The welfare of their children, family and society is enshrined as the guiding principle in all their endeavors. Women are capable of considering their options and making evidence based choices.

Today's women are learning to avoid situations that make them stressful and it is a hard struggle to reach that goal. She has found music, yoga, aerobics, swimming, aromatherapy, massage and hypnotherapy that gives her the 'Quality time' amidst the multitude of chores! There will be a few who would class her as the 'High maintenance woman'. Despite all this, the new woman, 'The Super Power' has arrived' who still believes in the power and value of a family unit that she is quite determined to hold in high esteem.

© E Menon 2008 I am a doctor working in the UK. I love writing and my articles have been published in the UK and abroad. My hobbies include reading, writing, gardening, cooking, watching films, listening to music, helping environmental causes. Etc. Visitors to my homepage get the unique opportunity to read my monthly write up,'Corner' and articles written by me on various topics in two languages, English and Malayalam (the language spoken in Kerala, otherwise known as 'God's own Country'!)

Pain Caused by Ill Fitting Bras

It is estimated that well over 70 percent of women wear ill-fitting bras. Not only does this lead to discomfort, it can actually manifest as actual pain over time.

Most people view bras as top down support systems. In English, this means they view the support being provided by the straps over the shoulders. In truth, bras are meant to be bottom up support system. The strap around the bottom of the bra is intend to carry 80 percent of the weight of the breasts with the cups and straps taking on the remaining weight.

Most women wear bras that rely too much on strap support. This can lead to physical discomfort that one might not always associate with the ill fitting bra. Let's take a closer look at some of the common pain issues that arise.

Shoulder pain is one of the more obvious problems of an ill fitting bra. The straps dig into the shoulders causing pain. For some, however, the problem is a bit more intense. The straps may dig into the trapeze muscle and nerves. This can lead to numbness and tingling in the arms.

A second area of pain that most women are familiar with is the back. When straps are carrying more weight than intended, they tend to pull the upper back forward and down. This creates poor posture and strain on the upper back. This can lead to aches and a knot in the middle of the upper back. As the back tries to compensate, it can also lead to significant lower back pain.

Neck problems are a third area of pain that can arise with an ill fitting problem. It can be easy to miss the cause and effect relationship, however. Pain can manifest in the form of headaches and shooting pain which is derived from pinched nerves. Running ones hands along the outer edge of the back of the neck can quickly reveal tight areas.

The vast majority of women wear the wrong size of bra. Smaller breasted women tend to wear bras that are to big for them. Plus size women tend to wear bras that have cups that are too small. If you are having any of the above pain issues, try changing to a different fitting bra. Remember - support should be from the bottom.